last night during the show in camden nj, i had a moment that is the type of inner experience of performance that no one sees, but that is interesting to me internally. we were playing the song "then she did". one of my favorites, entirely created by perry. we began playing it and i closed my eyes. i often close my eyes to help focus more singly on what is happening in my ears. so i had closed my eyes at the beginning of the song and when i opened them again i had been engulfed entirely by smoke, dry ice. so much so that i could see nothing but the swirling clouds of smoke with one small single bright light in the distance. it turned out that the light was a light out at the soundboard in the middle of the audience. didnt know this at the time. so im cloaked in my cloud of smoke with my distant point of light and i thought that it sort of poetically represented my death. "then she did" is a song of death and it all seemed very comfortable conceptually. i could feel that the light was patient and id eventually get there, but that tonight i was a good distance from it, that all that really existed for me was my time here and, in particular, my extraordinary spot in the spectrum of human experience. namely, being on stage for the ritual of performance in front of thousands of people. this is the sort of internal experience i seek out to enrich my experience of performance, and thereby keep it interesting to me and by extension hopefully to you all.

most of the moments of most of my days on this janes gig, are about getting to the work at hand. working hard throughout the set. focus. jane says has been a different experience. i sit on a stool and i am given time to reflect on the enormous effect that jane bainters tiny story has had on all of us. i have at times been almost emotionally overwhelmed by the scope of all our struggles that is so eloquently and plainly spoken about by perry in that song. but that aside, like i said, it has been mostly about doing the best job i can to make this tour as good as it can be. today feels a little different though. it feels like a return to the beginning. janes obviously didnt begin here but in retrospect it was a big moment in the story. playing irvine seems like the beginning of the really big, and ultimately final, part of our success. it felt like we had arrived home as conquering heroes. lollapalooza was working (i had been skeptical) and we were therefore playing to crowds so much larger than we had up to that point. i am curious going into today, with this historical mindset, how i will end up feeling having come full circle. the car just arrived to take belle and i down to soundcheck. its good to be interested in ones life.

there are some days, and i hope you have all have as many as possible, that are entirely unlike the rest. my problem has never been that life got too dramatic for me; bad or good. it is that sometimes i let life get uneventful for long enough that it no longer seems important. that life doesnt seem important. therefore time just quietly tics by. this is not one of those days and this is about to be a time that doesnt do anything quietly. must finish packing. let it begin...

cant tell who to thank for the link; either, tr, rob sheridan or meantambourine. all three? whoever it is, thanks for the heads up on this beautiful short film. check it.

we in janes have made several phone calls, both individually and collectively, trying to find out why nin/ja ticket prices have wound up so much higher than the agreed upon price. it has been confusing and frustrating trying to get a straight, consistent and clear answer. a few weeks ago, trent told me about a ticket reselling phenomena that i hadnt understood before. i didnt understand at the time just how insidious this system is until ive had to watch it play out in real time. he wrote a really good concise and understandable explanation here. its a good read. have coffee first.

sorry. left the house for rehearsal without posting anything about austin. so to expedite things ive just copied and pasted a blurb by dave from the ja.com site:

We have been rehearsing all week for an upcoming private
show in Austin, Texas. We have set aside a number of tickets for those
of you who have signed up to the site. Stay tuned for more details
on how to attend this specific event and clear your schedule
the evening of the 19th.

its official. our friend tom morellos new project 'streetsweeper' is going to join us for the tour. you can hear some of his new grooves here at streetsweepermusic.com. sounds like cool stuff. its on.